Your Self Improvement Blog

I have been in the personal development business for more than fifteen years and, to be quite honest, a get a little fed up when I come across people, who are a danger to themselves, suddenly announcing that they’ve become a life coach because they completed a weekend course or get some internet accreditation. Life coaching is a serious business. A coach is in a position to play with people’s heads – and some of them do just that with awful results. Their clients ‘follow their heart’ – a saying that I’ve come across all too often – or people ‘go with the flow’ – another choice phrase. But I sometimes find myself trying to help someone pick up the pieces of their lives having followed this half-baked advice.

I host a two-day personal development seminar – I’ve been at it for over fifteen years – and I explain to clients that they’ve been given all the tools that they need to do whatever turns them on, whether that’s becoming financially independent, find their ‘soul mate’ (whatever that means!) or simply find happiness. However, the problem with most people is that they’d like someone to take them by the hand. When you were young, your parents led you by the hand – your teachers did much the same, perhaps not literally. Now that you’re older, you’ve got to grow up. You’ve got to be responsible for your life – you’re the only one who can. It’s time to stop depending on the props provided by others and start taking action for yourself – that’s what self help and self improvement mean.

You’ve got to understand that the only person who can get inside your head is you. And, more importantly, you’ve got to understand that, if you don’t get inside your head and take charge, nothing’s going to change for you . Over seven decades of research in from field of psychology confirms that the normal mind controls the normal person and that this normal mind is tortured by the ghosts of our formative years. Neuro-psychological research also tells us that, when we assume control of our minds, we can enter what successful people call the ‘peak performance zone’ and transform our lives. But it’s down to you to make that move.

You’ve got to whip your wild mind into shape. Your normal mind is wild because, at this moment in time, it is a law unto itself. It’s obsessed with your past and worried about your future – and you’re stuck, helpless, in the middle. You need to get your hands on the levers of power – tell your mind who’s in charge. Teach your mind to focus on the here and now – the place and time that your mind won’t focus on at all – the time and place that life is lived, where risks are taken, where opportunity knocks.

And, now that you’ve got to the end of this article, take ten minutes to, quite literally, smell the roses. Sit down and shut your eyes, experience the noise of the real world, the aromas of now, the sense of your own breathing – the reality of the moment. Because, until you come to your senses, you’re wasting your life.

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