Your Self Improvement Blog

The majority of my Personal Development clients, when we meet for the first time, sense that they’ve become stuck – maybe they feel that they’ve encountered that so-called glass ceiling, maybe they have a feeling that they’re going through the motions or that, in some vague way, they sense that there must be more to life than the daily ritual that passes for living. As one client said to me “Oh God, I can’t even get excited about our vacation anymore, we’re going to the same place in July that we’ve been for the last six years”.

You reach a point where things become stale in life unless you constantly keep reinventing and renewing. However, But it’s not your life that grinds to a shuddering halt, it’s you! Or, more correctly, it’s actually your state of mind that becomes so anaesthetized by the day to day routine that passes for living, that you just sink into oblivion. Your problem is that you stopped experiencing new things during your teenage years. The normal mind is wide open to all new experiences during early and mid childhood – that’s when our sponge-like capacity to take everything in means that we really were, indeed, taking everything in. By eleven or 12, we started closing up shop. By 19 or 20, we were a done deal. Subsequently, with the exception of truly momentous events in our lives – like the birth of a child, or a bereavement – we experience nothing much. We think we are experiencing, but actually what our subconscious mind is doing is interpreting everything on the basis of old stored knowledge and pigeonholing the new experience accordingly. In other words, the normal adult state of mind is completely unaware, numb, reactive, divorced from reality and simply going through the motions.

Life never grinds to a halt – the universe and our world and everything in it is reinventing itself again and again. Opportunities abound, adventures beckon, new people are will change the course of your life (in the same way as once total strangers changed it in the past). But you’re numb, cocooned in the apparent safety of a normality that is literally sucking you dry. Not only can you not see the opportunity and adventure of life – because you’re not looking or seeing – even if you could, you wouldn’t feel up to taking the choice to leap onto life’s wonderful rollercoaster. That’s because, as adults, we’re used to not making any real choices. The normal adult almost never takes the decision to choose their own thoughts – they would prefer that the subconscious do the choosing for them like an automaton.

So, if you’ve arrived at an impasse or a crossroads, it’s up to you to take the right route, it’s up to you to choose, it’s up to you to kickstart your life in the direction that you want it to go. Not a single aspect of your life will ever change unless you make some changes yourself.

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